Metropolitan Center for Independent Living

Sometimes my disability makes me feel like that other people think
I can't do other things at all.

with my disability sometimes i cant do all the things because i feel nervous . sometimes i like to try new things. when i was younger i didn't know as much about my disability as now

Thanks for sharing Allycat. What does that make you feel like? What makes you think that they think you can't do some things?

Sometimes we ALL need to prove to others that we CAN do things that others may think we cannot do. It is something that happens to many people with and without disabilities. However, people that base thier feels on the fact that you have a disability is wrong. Just ask for a chance to prove yourself and I am sure that you can change the attitudes of the people that doubt you.

Thanks for posting Eliott87! It's good to hear that you are aware that being nervous can be a barrier to doing things. It's also good to hear that you are learning more about your disability. This makes it much easier to find ways to do things that work for you.

Anxiety (feeling nervous) is something that happens to most people when trying new things. If it keeps you from doing what you need to do, you might want to talk to a counselor about it. Otherwise, many people manage this by:
-Preparing as much as possible
-Practicing or role playing
-Learning all you can before you start
-Making sure to learn the skills you need to get started
-Using positive self-talk to keep calm (like telling yourself "it will go well" and "you can do this")
-Working with a mentor, friend who does the task well, or teacher
-Being patient with yourself- trying something new will turn into something that you know how to do well if you keep going
-Have a strategy (plan what you need to do) and a back-up plan
-Know that mistakes will happen, and that you may learn more from mistakes than when everything goes right.

Thanks Alleycat and Taylor...
I wish it were as easy as asking for a fair chance, but because people have prejudices about disabilities, sometimes it doesn't work to just tell people to give you a chance. This is a particular kind of prejudice against people with disabilities called "Ableism" (or "Disablism," both are the same thing). This is a big thing to work against, but you are not alone--staff at Centers for Independent Living, millions of self-advocates in the whole world, and organizations like ACT and ARC are also working to end this form of discrimination.

It's been helpful to me to think about specific ways that I can do what they are asking, and show and tell them about the ways that I work around my disabilities to do what they think I cannot.
For example, sometimes people think that I can't speak in front of crowds because I have a form of autism. So I show them the list of places that I've spoken and the thank you notes that people have sent me for doing that, or I talk about ways that I've learned to speak effectively, or I ask if I can answer their questions about what they are afraid I can't do.
It can also be helpful to give information about your disability or disabilities in general, that tells them about what people can do.

Sometimes people need to be reminded that discriminating based on disability is against the law- there are several laws like the Americans with Disabilities Act, the Fair Housing Act, and lots of local and state laws that protect your rights against discrimination.

Other times, it can be helpful to have an advocate help you to show what you can do. This can be a friend, parent, or teacher who you trust not to take over but to give you back power. You can also talk to your transition coordinator, case manager, or other professionals about advocating with you. I work as Individual Advocate at MCIL to help people find ways to stand up for themselves.
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On the topic of not wanting to recognize or face our own differences, I ran across a posting on a blog from a self-advocate organizer in Canada that I found helpful in thinking about this:
http://davehingsburger.blogspot.com/200 ... a-are.html

Read it and let us know what you think!

As a vocational rehab. counselor, one of my biggest challenges in working with students in high school was that it seemed many students didn't understand or accept their disability. In fact, I was very careful in using the word "disability" since many would respond: "What? I don't have a disability!" And then I would lose them right there. The thing is, we ALL have strengths and limitations. So in fact, rather than having to label these, the important things to know are: What is hard for me? What should I avoid when considering a job? What helps me learn? How can I be successful? What "assistive technology" or "accommodations" can help me get a job where I can make good money, and be happy?

And there are many people out there that can help! C3 is a wonderful website to start researching who can help! www.c3online.org . Check it out!!!!